Sometimes I think blogging has a way of making homeschooling look unreal. All fun and no tears. This is just not truth, and ANY homeschool mom will attest to that! We do have plenty of great days, plenty of fun. We get to be flexible, follow interests, go on tons of field trips, do projects, play games...and yet, we are talking about real life humans doing these things. When a game day ends in tears because someone got arrogant or sensitive. When math or writing seems so overwhelming tears are unleashed. Days when someone is just having a bad day. We have plenty of those.
In the interest of keeping this blog real, and not letting it look like we have it all together...I want to share about our week. The good, the bad, and the ugly right? Buckle up for some ugly!
(In all fairness, this face is in response to being told he had completed his All About Reading Level. :)
I assured him the next level was on its way!)
Monday: got up early to school at my sister's who is sick and needed help homeschoolong her girls, Lego class, and then back to my sisters to finish school. Took E to the gym.
J and her friend at Lego class.
Family dinner at my parents. Late night debate led to getting home late which led to . . .
A tired Wednesday: we managed to do "school" but I sent this text to my husband in the early afternoon--
Ugh. Exhausted. Procrastinating. Unmotivated. Did I mention exhausted? Way too much time wasted and now we still have so much to do. Consider this my confession. Did I mention I was exhausted?
Continued plugging along and then before I knew it, yup, time to take E to the gym, Crazily throw sandwiches together so we can eat before church. Church night so another late night.
Thursday: downward spirals rarely turn up by themselves, and somewhere around Tuesday, if not then SURELY Wednesday I should have realized it was time to back off and switch gears. Apparently I am dense this week and as Thursday got underway ... well, lets just say I didn't switch gears as I should have. Somewhere after lunch my FB status was-
One of those days I swear someone paid my children to act like this. . . Seriously, who hates me enough and what did you give them?!? I surrender! Ready to enter negotiations!
Several other homeschool moms were quick to commiserate! ;)
Ugh yes, this was my fault. We were all exhausted, grumpy, and I was plowing through the to do list like it mattered. Which it doesn't. As if the yelling and critical spirit wasn't enough I lost the homeschool mom of the year award somewhere between making C cry over math and telling E to "get her freakin' head in the game". :( Yeah, not my shining moments. (Lest anyone freak I overwhelmingly apologized to them and they to me, and all is right in our world again!) Started dinner only to hear screams from the children I just sent outside informing me there was a toad on the playground.
ummm, this was a frog on steroids ... uninvitingly squatting on our playground. And he was less than thrilled with my eviction procedures. After about 20 very frustrating minutes of throwing soccer balls, soccer nets, and using a broom to shoo this Hulk frog away, all I got him to do was jump off. No amount of pleading got him to leave. I abandoned my sad attempts much to the disappointment of some children.
THEN my phone (i.e. GPS) froze on the way to taking dinner to a family with a new baby. I got snippy with my poor husband as he pulled over in his car to help me navigate where I was going... <shaking my head in frustration at myself>
What a disaster of the week. But wait, it's not over. Remember where I said we were all exhausted? A family birthday had us out late again, and on top of that I had some work to get done and stayed up until 3 am (and I still didn't finish! ugh.)
Friday: woke up late (hmmm wonder why?!) jumped in the shower to take J to music class only to almost pass out. I have this strange heart arythmea that acts up about very few years and decided to rear its ugly head this morning. So for an hour and a half I was on the bathroom floor struggling to breathe and get my heart regulated with my husband wanting to call 911 and me trying to convince myself it will be over soon as it has every other time. (This has been happening since I was young).
Well, all week the hints to slow down were there but I barged right through them with my own task oriented self at the helm. <shaking head again>.
So today, the littles are at work with their grandfather, E and I are having a relaxing day at home while a housekeeper cleans my house. (Thanks to my fantastic hubby!)
So, after a week like this, I should be printing school enrollment papers! But no, the truth is, I am human and we will have days and yes, even weeks like this one. But at the end of the day (or week!), I don't have any more patience than anyone else, or better kids, or more energy, or superpowers. I am just a mom. A mom in love with these three precious kids God has given her. I mess up, sometimes worse than others...At times I frustrate myself and my kids, lose sight of the goal, and rely on my strength not God's, but that's ok. I am not a perfect mom, I am a forgiven mom. A mom who has been called to stay home and educate her three amazing children who will one day make an amazing impact on the kingdom of God. A mom so grateful for grace. I can do this, not because of me, but because of Him.