Showing posts with label Encouragement. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Encouragement. Show all posts
Each year it seems that God lays something on my heart to focus on with my children-- my homeschool goal for that year. One of the greatest benefits of homeschooling is the refining it is for me! 

 This year my homeschool goal is simple: Engage. 

                                           
One simple word, but yet full of meaning and conviction. 

 From Dictionary.com:

en·gage  

/enˈgāj/
Verb
  1. Occupy, attract, or involve (someone's interest or attention).
  2. Cause someone to become involved in (a conversation or discussion).



So, let's break it down.

Attract

Have you ever been so excited about a topic or a curriculum only to be met with your child's glazed over eyes? Shocking right??? How on earth can they not be excited about Shakespeare or Martin Luther?!?!

Well, something along the line drew us into the topics and subjects we are excited about. Something ENGAGED us. Our ears perk up when we hear those topics and we seek them out. 

A love of the Rennaisance or the Reformation is not innate. It must be cultivated. I must demonstrate my love and passion, and then BE PATIENT with them as they develop their own loves and passions.

To attract my kids I need to be patient--they are turned off by my frustration. Yeah. duh. I know. 

Not everything is going to be fun and exciting...but I definitely need to make MY attitude attractive. 


Involve

Include Their Preferences

I don't always involve or include my children in WHAT we are studying. And I don't necessarily think that is wrong. We have to study Bible, math, grammar, spelling, writing, reading, science, history, etc. There are subjects I have deemed important for whatever reason. But I can involve them in HOW we study these subjects. My kids are crafty. I am doing what I can to give them every opportunity to color, cut, and paste to their hearts content. If it involved glue and scissors they are engaged! I involve their preferences when possible. It is amazing how art paper and colored markers will engage my daughter in writing spelling words. Or placing a mini chocolate chip at the end of each section of my sons reading page. Often, it is the simple things.

                                              


Discuss

I also need to involve them in the learning process. It's not just about "teaching" them or teaching "at them" or "to them." To engage them, I must elicit response and discussion. Engage the material. Talk about it, dialog, narrate. Make retellings and narrations a part of the learning process and not just a task to be checked off. My kids remember much more of what we discuss than just what we read. 

Narrower and Deeper

It is because of this fact that we shifted our history and science focus this year. Instead of a mile wide and and inch deep, we are going for a narrower and deeper scope. I would rather cover less, and have them ENGAGED. I am fully prepared to cross weeks off of our history plans because maybe the Pilgrims and Squanto caught their interest and we camped out there. I want them to be excited about what we are studying...in order to do that I need to allow them a higher level of involvement. 

Seize Learning Opportunities

I am a planner. I love plans, lists, charts...but the best homeschool plans are plans that can be changed. When we read The Red Sales to Capri, my kids were enthralled as we researched the Blue Grotto in Italy. It was so much fun. Mr. Popper's Penguins gave my kids a great interest in Antarctica and penguins. They may never be that interested in that topic ever again-- seize the opportunity-- take time to deviate and actually learn! 

Slow Down.

Engaging doesn't happen when you are box checking. I like to "complete" things. I hate skipping anything so I get how hard it can be. But in order to engage...a lot of the time less is more. Not less time invested, not less time learning...just less time doing that which is not sticking and more time engaging in that which is being embedded in their hearts and minds. 


Teach

I know this seems silly. (and yes, I know this wasn't in the definition!) So, duh, of course we are going to teach, we are homeschooling! What does teaching have to do with engaging? Well, maybe I am the only one to experience this but... You just deliver this wonderful math lesson (it's fully scripted so of course it was awesome!) only to present the worksheet to your child and then see their glazed over eyes staring at it like it is written in Greek.

ok, so of course you sweetly smile at your eager little learner and reteach the lesson in your most gentle and patient voice. 

No?

Yeah, not so much here either...All to often, I get FRUSTRATED when my darling little learners don't get it the first time. We know how to do it, I just explained it-- why don't they get it?!?!? This attitude is ridiculous--I know that. They are LITTLE and chances are this is NEW. 

Reality Flash: They may not get it the first time. (Why is that so hard for me to remember!?!?!)

Sigh. 

You mean we actually have to TEACH? Not just read the script and expect immediate retention? So, you can see why the whole "teach" thing is not such a given for me! ;) This year, I want to teach...not read scripts or lessons, but engage my learner until they...get this... learn. 


Enage. It seemed so simple right? I guess it is. It just takes time, patience, and flexibility. All things homeschool moms have an abundance of right!?!?! ;) 
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That sounds so discouraging. So defeating. We live in a society that wants the easiest...the simplest, the shortcut, and the pleasurable. If it's not easy...it's not happening.

All too often, this is how we homeschool.

Often when looking for curriculum we look for the easiest to use, that which takes the least amount of work on our part...

OK. Depressed yet? ;)

I'm not saying simple isn't good. I am not saying open and go is wrong. I am not even saying easy to use is wrong. What am I saying?

We are asking the wrong questions.

Maybe when it's all said and done, you will end up with an open and go easy to use curriculum because that is what is best for your family at that time. But maybe you won't. We shouldn't be asking what is the least we can do...but what can we do to fulfill God's purpose?

When moms considering homeschooling come to me asking for help, I am so torn. On one hand--I LOVE homeschooling. I am passionate about it and think it is an amazing journey. But...it's not always easy. I always hesitate sharing the tough parts-- people already think we are crazy for homeschooling as it is! But, in the end it's not my job to convince or not convince someone to homeschool-- it's my job to share truth, and point them to seek God's will for them. Because homeschooling is a calling...a wonderful, amazing, mostly joyous calling...that is hard. 

Choosing the best isn't easy. Getting up every day and dealing with complaints, tantrums, and whining--not easy. Begging kids to just finish the dang math problem they have been staring at for 30 minutes...not easy. What? This doesn't happen at your house?

Oh, there are wonderful days. Most days even have wonderful components to it. I love my kids. I love teaching them, investing in them, helping to shape who they are becoming, filling their hearts with God's Word-- all wonderful, yet, not easy.

But, I'm not in it for the easy, I'm in it for the investment. I want to pick resources that take us towards the goal we have for our kids-- Biblically sound, Gospel proclaiming, righteousness seeking servants and warriors for the Kingdom of God. That's a lofty goal. I think it's biblical...but I don't think it's easy. 

I am not saying we should over-complicate it. I am not saying we should fill our days with useless busy work. I am saying that we should be ready and willing to work at this. We should be intentional, and ready to INVEST....to recognize that teaching our children is a high calling. The public school system is NOT our standard. Excellence in heart, mind, and soul is our standard -- being made complete in Christ is our standard.

That is a seriously tall order-- a daunting task. But don't be discouraged. Take Heart! Aren't you glad we aren't alone? Without the help of the Holy Spirit-- this whole thing is futile, but with Him? We can't lose. When things get tough, and you can be found on the bathroom floor in tears (ok, maybe that's just me?), seek His help, His comfort, His power, and His Spirit to complete the task ...the calling, He has given. You have been called, and by His power, you will complete it!

It's not about the end result--it's about our journey for God's Glory.

Homeschooling isn't Easy...

by on 8:54 PM
That sounds so discouraging. So defeating. We live in a society that wants the easiest...the simplest, the shortcut, and the pleasurable. If...
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We have had a crazy summer around here, and I cannot believe it is time to start school! I have missed all of you in blogland and am looking forward to getting back! I hope your summer was wonderful, and everything is getting ready for your new school year. I wanted to share this little poem, and hope it makes you smile! :) Happy Planning and Not Back to School time everyone!!

Summer is over...

 Summer is over and all through the house 
Not a mama was sleeping not even an ounce.
Curriculum was organized in shelves with care,
In hopes that the bank account would soon be repaired.

 The children were resting all sweet in their beds,
While visions of new read alouds danced in their heads.
And mama at the laptop, the printer going strong,
Had her coffee and planner working all the night long.

 When all of a sudden, she jumped with a start,
Surely something is missing, I have forgotten some part!
Away to her lists and her charts she flew,
Reviewing the details and checklists to do.

 But alas all was right in her crazy little world,
Ideas and excitement around her now swirled.
Curriculum ordered, all printed and bound,
She was ready, the children she would soon astound.

 All the hard work and planning of the months past,
Would too soon be changed and she'd have to think fast.
For no matter how hard you plan and prepare,
The children never fit your plan, so not fair. 

 So weeks and months down the road, don't despair.
Your children won't remember your plans, but your care.
So sleep homeschool mommy, rest indeed.
For free you shall be to enjoy them, take heed.

 Love those little faces and smile at things gone awry.
Read stories, and cuddle, build tents and lie.
For the memories made and the love shared,
Will last forever, but precious time is rare.
T
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I heard a great message this weekend aimed at children’s ministry workers. The speaker encouraged us to never think that we are “justa” Sunday school teacher or “justa” nursery worker…that we are called by God for His purpose.

I know I have been there. Someone you just meet asks you what you do. A laundry list of thoughts run through my mind before I say, “I stay home with my kids” or “I homeschool my three littles.”

I KNOW the truth. That being a stay at home mom is the highest calling I could fathom, and the most difficult. I am so grateful for the opportunity to be with my children every day and guide them in the building of their character and academic education. I DO believe it is an amazingblessing. I believe that not one of those college and seminary classes was wasted. I KNOW that. And most of the time I feel that. But, sometimes? Sometimes I give in to the thought that I am “justa” homeschool mom.


It’s in those times, when I question and wonder, and even doubt, I must remind myself of God’s calling.

Hear, O Israel:The LORD our God, the LORD is one. 5 You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. 6 And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. 7 You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. 8 You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. 9 You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on yourgates. Deut 6:5-9

I am NOT “JUSTA” homeschool mom. I am called out by God for a specific purpose. That purpose right now is primarily fulfilled by glorifying God in raising my children in godliness and homeschooling them to rise up and impact the kingdom of God. I get the blessing of teaching them as we rise up and as we lie down. I am called just as Moses was called to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. I am called just as Joshua was called to lead the Israelites into the promise land. I am called just as Rahab was called to hide the spies. And Jonah was called to warn the Ninevites. I am called for His purpose not mine.

Ten years ago this was not my dream. I had a completely different plan for my life. However, so much of that is just geography.

The heart of my calling is the same. To live passionately for His glory, leading others to the Father. And it starts in my home. I am thankful to look at those called before me—Moses, Rahab, Joshua, Jonah…. Moses was “Justa” whiner with a stutter. Joshua was “justa” youth. Rahab was “justa” prostitute. And Jonah was “justa” coward. I am happy to join the ranks of the “justa’s” that have been called by God to do great things in His strength. Thankfully, just like those “Justa’s” before us, God constantly refines us into the person He wants us to be. No longer a “justa,” but a child of His called according to His purpose.

"Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in
You will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ" ~Phil. 1:6

"Justa" Homeschool Mom

by on 5:46 PM
I heard a great message this weekend aimed at children’s ministry workers. The speaker encouraged us to never think that we are “justa” Sun...
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Do you ever feel overwhelmed? The task of educating your children too daunting a thought? Concerned about teaching character more than academics, yet somehow trying not to sacrifice said academics? Questioning curriculum choices, methodologies, and educational philosophies? Feel like you are on a tight rope, never sure if you are doing the right thing?


I have realized lately that I am impossible to please. Over Christmas break I began to question if I was doing "enough" in our homeschool. Sometimes those sparkly catalogs, websites, and forums get me thinking just a little too much.

The day after thinking I might not be doing enough I read a few threads on a forum I frequent about being relaxed in the early homeschool years, and visions of cuddling with my precious cuties on the couch reading read alouds for hours danced in my head.

Then Monday came. Our first day back to school after Christmas break. We started school at 9:30 and ended at 4:00 just in time to get E to the gym. I began to question my approach. 6.5 hours of school is absurd for a seven year old. (So much for my fears of not being rigorous enough!)

Tuesday. hmmm today was too easy. Perhaps we should do more...

Sound familiar? Ok, I will be honest. Usually the pendulum swings of emotions and self doubt don't swing so closely together, but I do feel like a yo-yo sometimes. Are we doing too much? Are we not doing enough? Should we be doing more writing? Adding in Latin? Not do writing or grammar formally? You get the idea. I could mentally decimate myself daily over stressing about my children's education.  The responsibility weighs so heavy sometimes...

The pressures of life expand to so many other areas-- friendships, family, ministry. What to do, when to help, when not to. Facing life threatening illnesses and life changing decisions of those you love. Challenges like these and the salvation of those you love-- way beyond the scope of our control. Sometimes the weight  can just seem impossible.

Reading in my devotional today, I had one of those moments. You know the ones where you have read that verse over and over but all of a sudden you see something you have never seen before?


Mark 10:27 "With man it is impossible, but not with God. For all things are possible with God." 

"It is impossible" Not it may be impossible or it may seem impossible. No. It IS impossible. In a strange but comforting way, I take heart. I can't do it...no matter how hard I try. My strength is not enough. My abilities and efforts will not turn my children into mighty servants and warriors for Christ. My pleadings and less than eloquent attempts of sharing the Gospel will save not even one. My heartfelt help to others does nothing.

Despairing news? Not at all! "But not with God. For all things are possible with God." Apart from the sovereign grace and work of Christ, ALL is futile. But with it? ALL is possible.

What a great reminder to spend less time fretting and more time praying. As I have been studying the book of James in the last few weeks, I am constantly aware of my need for faith and works to go hand in hand. However, stressing over those works will get me nowhere. However, resting in His grace as the faith He has implanted in my heart blooms into works around me-- in my marriage, my children, my family, friends and the world-- that allows me to breathe.

With Man it is impossible...

by on 5:37 PM
Do you ever feel overwhelmed? The task of educating your children too daunting a thought? Concerned about teaching character more than acade...
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We live in a world of make believe. No not fairies and unicorns, but the false realities of blogs and Pinterest. In the last few weeks I have read several blogs and articles on the "dangers" of Pinterest, and how people are in essence breaking free of the Pinterest trap where they feel guilty over buying store bought cookies.

Part of me says good for you, and part of me wants to laugh uncontrollably. Blogs and Pinterest are not always reality, or at least a full picture of reality. Wait, am I saying that I and other bloggers are lying and not representing reality? No, however, no one can share the whole story, even if they try.

Yes, we may have done some very cool projects or organizing that might help someone else, but did anyone ask what DIDN'T get done that day? My dear husband can attest to the many loads of laundry he folds because I would often be content to just pick clothes right out of the basket. Or the other numerous household chores he does so that I am free to do "other" things like invest in our children's education, blog, or just collapse in exhaustion at the end of the day.

This is reality:

Of course my school room is nice and organized. I cleaned it to take the picture! ;) How about the months of November and December where we schooled at the kitchen table because my school room was such a mess we couldn't find the table to school on... (I did finally clean it btw!) ;)

Pinterest and blogs are just part of the picture. Notice most blogs focus on one thing: homeschooling, cooking, organic or clean eating, fashion, etc. No one has it all together. We are all humans with a plethora of faults and failures, and we all get it right sometimes. Pinterest and blogs are the snapshots of those we did it moments. (Although, I do try to share our fair share of we missed it moments because I think those often inspire just as much!) 

 It saddens me when I hear people saying that a blog, particularly mine, has made them feel guilty as a parent or a homeschool mom. That isn't the point. The idea behind Pinterest and blogs is to inspire and show what things look like for them. For every positive thing that get posted or pinned, 400 negative ones happened in our home. My kids watch too much tv, eat too much fast food, and I spend way to much time on the computer... but hey, we do projects and read books! ;)

I am going to be honest, I think Pinterest has made me a better mom. Those ideas I always wanted to do, but had no idea how? I  now have easy access and quick instructions. We all have gifts, and Pinterest and blogs allow us to share them. I don't feel a guilt in the world if that mom came up with the idea and I just did it with my kids. I did it and that is all that matters. And all the ideas I don't get to? Who cares? If I pin 20 recipes and only use three, did my family and I not benefit?

Allow the ideas you see online to inspire you to do more, to enjoy your children and your spouse, but not to place a burden upon you. God has a purpose for each of our lives individually and my call and yours are not going to be the same. We all have different personalities and things that invigorate or exhaust us. We are all different and we all have different gifts.

Don't get overwhelmed or weary at seeing what you think is "good." Remember it may not be "best" or even "good" for your family. Remember, the person who cooked that gourmet meal, cleaned and organized that room, had to sacrifice other things to do it.  And the day that huge project got done? They ate pizza.

Be encouraged. You are the person God has chosen to be married to your spouse, raise your children, manage your home, and for many, homeschool your children. God has you in these roles for a purpose, and you are the best one for the job.

The next time you are tempted to be discouraged or feel inferior due to something you see on Pinterest, remember that behind the pretty picture is the mess of their own reality . . . just slightly outside the border of the image.
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I have spent the last five days watching my four month old great nephew fight for his life. What happened? He got a cold. A virus. Born at 30 weeks, our premature little fighter's lungs couldn't handle it and soon had pneumonia and a partially collapsed lung.



The doctors became desperate as nothing they were doing was helping. He was moved from one ventilator to another when it became maxed out and too soon it looked inevitable that the second ventilator would do the same.

On my way to NY last Thursday they decided to transfer him to a hospital that had an ECMO machine so that they could run a bypass for his lungs, allowing them to heal. The transfer was scary. To see 5+ doctors, 6+ nurses and a few EMS working on a four month old for hours just trying to get him stable enough to transfer him from his bed to an isolette...it was hard to watch.

Upon his transfer they were hoping he wouldn't need to be put on ECMO. They were hoping the transfer was just a precaution. I left the hospital that night around 10 or so only to get a call around midnight that our little fighter's heart had stopped for 25 minutes. They decided to put him on lung ECMO because they did not think his heart could handle it if it happened again.

Back to the hospital over an hour away.  I sat there in the waiting room with my two sisters, brother in law, and the baby's mom and dad listening to the doctor explain the situation, and that they were struggling to get him on ECMO because of all he had been through. He said there were no guarantees even if they got him on the machine, and even just getting him on it was looking doubtful. The doctor explained to my niece this was a "hail Mary pass."

He was able to get on the ECMO, but not without his heart stopping again. Since then his heart stopped another time and they placed him on heart ECMO as well. A machine is running his heart and lungs, a ventilator breathing for him. This situation is the definition of desperate.

As this situation has unfolded there have been so many people praying for this precious baby and his family. People for whom prayer is part of their daily lives, and others who probably couldn't remember the last time they prayed. All too often we see prayer as a "hail Mary pass" in desperate situations. That thing we do when nothing else has worked. An SOS of sorts. This has been so heavy on my heart this week because as I rejoice with so many that understand our God is the God of miracles, and that God has the power to heal, my heart aches. God is so much greater than a genie in a bottle.

God does not want to be our last resort, He wants to be our first response. It's great to go to God with our struggles, our pain, and our burdens, but He wants more. God wants a personal relationship with us, to walk with us every moment of every day. To rejoice in our triumphs, cry with us over our heartbreaks, carry us when we are too weak to stand, and yes breathe for us when our body is too weak to breathe.

Yes, I pray for a miracle for my sweet little fighter, and I pray for God to breathe life into his little lungs. To heal him like only He can do. I also pray for spiritual healing. In tragedy many go to a God they don't know, but how much better to go to the God you know intimately?

I cannot imagine going through the last few days or the next few without the comfort of Jesus Christ. I have probably prayed more in the last week than last month. Tragedy and desperation often reveal in us a  yearning for our Creator. We are created with a need for Him, a desperation for Him. While tragedy may reveal this truth, I pray that those that seek Him in their times of need, understand their greatest need...salvation. And as Christians, we need to see prayer as more than a laundry list of requests, a direct line to our own personal make a wish foundation. We need to embrace prayer as communication with the Most High God. Go to Him first, not last. Seek Him moment by moment, and not only when tragedy forces us to our knees.

Prayer: A Hail Mary Pass?

by on 4:06 PM
I have spent the last five days watching my four month old great nephew fight for his life. What happened? He got a cold. A virus. Born at 3...
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I can't be the only one that struggles with the blurred lines of mom verses homeschool mom. How much of my time do I spend planning, researching, preparing, teaching, and doing projects. I have even come to view regular childhood activities like the park, children's museum, cooking, baking, and read alouds as part of the "curriculum." The amount of pressure mom's already put on themselves is absurd, then you add on their child's education, socialization, college options, and future career options to the list -- daunting is an understatement.

I wake up with the goal of getting the children moving to start school in a timely manner. We move through the day checking off the planner, going to the activities on the calendar, check, check, check...

I often fail to get laundry done during the week or leave a load long enough in the washer it has to be rerun the next day, and most of the cleaning happens on the weekends. My toddler gets way too little attention, and my mind is never still. By the time I have researched and planned curriculum for one year it is time to start planning for the next! I strive to teach and correct, but I still want them to know I am their biggest fan.

Sometimes homeschooling can seem all consuming. Sometimes, I just need to focus on being a mom. This week we had regular schoolwork, Operation Christmas Child packing, Lego class, music class, gymnastics, piano lessons, play dates, meetings, and a few doctors visits thrown in. However, in the midst of the scheduled chaos, I tried to find time to just be a mom. Time to play with friends, cuddle, read books not on the schedule, play at the park, cook together, paint finger and toe nails, make some new Pinterest recipes, dance and sing at music class and enjoy it instead of thinking ahead to all I have to do when I get home.


Yes, we still homeschooled. I still taught. We did math, language arts, history, and more science than we have done in awhile. We finished a math chapter I have been avoiding like the plague because of all the mess it would entail. It got done, and I enjoyed so much of it.

Yes, we finished science at 8 pm last night because of a doctors appointment, a trip to Chik Fil A, Spanish immersion class, and dinner with grandma. And I am OK with that. We might not have gotten in all four scheduled days of spelling, but we did progress, and we took a week to remember we are a family who homeschools, not a "homeschool family."  I am a mom who homeschools, not a "homeschool mom." Yes, I teach math, cursive, and how to read; and yes, I correct and assign, but I also love, cuddle, encourage, play, and even cook and clean. Sometimes I just need a break from my role as home teacher, and remember that my students only have one mom and she shouldn't disappear just because there is school work to be done.

Finishing Week 14 at the park!

Mom vs. Homeschool Mom

by on 9:02 PM
I can't be the only one that struggles with the blurred lines of mom verses homeschool mom. How much of my time do I spend planning, res...
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If you are familiar with the Five Love Languages (of Children), you know every person (and child) has a special language they give and receive love. While this is true, I have yet to see a child not greatly impacted by words no matter their primary "love language."

As I put J down for a nap today, I snuggled close to her and whispered in her ear a little ritual we do often. "I love your smile. I love your giggle. I love your love of life. I love your expressions. I love how you capture attention. I love your ability to entertain any time any where. I love your wit. I love your one liners. I love how you make me laugh. I love how you love. I love your passion. I love how you play a crowd. I love to watch you dance. I love your chocolate eyes. I love you. From the top of your hair to the tip of your toes." With each encouraging word her body relaxed, her breathing evened out, her smile grew big, and she snuggled closer to me. She responded physically and emotionally. All of my kids do the same thing. When you begin to tell them all that you love about them, their heart and eyes latch on and their heart and body respond to words of life pouring into them.


Critical or threatening words also elicit a physical and emotional response. I love my children, but one of my gravest flaws as a mom is my lack of self control in the area of words. No I don't name call, or curse, but I do yell and criticize. It is a generational sin I fight every day. What can I say, I am Italian. ;) Yelling was such a part of my home growing up, a part of my culture. Then I married a boy from Mississippi. We often joke that our wedding was My Big Fat Greek Wedding meets Sweet Home Alabama! He is gentle and soft spoken. Refined. To make him angry it is usually a slow boil, rarely boiling over. I, on the other hand, am a volcano. He is helping me to make this volcano dormant . . . this is no easy task!

Just as they respond wholly to words of encouragement, all of my children respond physically to yelling. They get tense, move farther away physically, eyes downcast, fear in their eyes. Yes they know I would never hurt them physically, yet their affect shows their emotional pain. C is the most dramatic physically. He cowers. If I begin to yell he hides or runs or will get into a ball or cover his ears. I rarely yell at C. As soon as I begin and he acts like I have physically beat him, I immediately check my voice and usually whisper a much better response. His response is extreme, but it shows exactly what all children feel when they hear yelling and criticism. While I am saddened that I ever yell at C, I appreciate his extreme response because it is a grave reminder of how damaging that habit can be.

In the same way, C responds the most physically when receiving words of affirmation. Each word of encouragement calms him, fills his soul, encourages his heart, and breathes life into his precious being. Seeing this response is a physical reminder to fill their hearts with words of encouragement. Research shows that children need 13 affirmations per 1 negative comment, correction, or criticism. 13 to 1!!! Oh, how backwards things are here all too often. I am deepening my commitment to speak words that encourage and affirm, telling these precious three children in my life what I really think about them. That they are fantastic, amazing, talented, intelligent, loved, cherished, and mine!

I want to speak life, not judgment. Encouragement not criticism. This is an area of my life that I struggle with daily, but I will not give in. I will fight my flesh everyday to speak life.
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There are some weeks that when you finally sit down and reflect you think, goodness! I need a break! This was one of those weeks!

Sunday: We went out to visit my mom who is RV camping on the beach. Beautiful weather and a great family day!


Monday: We are on week 4 of our 8 week Lego engineering class. A highlight of their week!



Tuesday and Wednesday: Tuesday morning we had family pictures and then we headed back out to the beach to spend some time with Grandma. Camping in an RV is my kind of camping! A few days of fall weather was very welcomed and we took advantage of the weather by schooling and playing outside.







P.E. homeschool style! (with their cousins!)



We completed all of our school week, but didn't feel like we dug very deep especially in history and science. E is hung up on Step 12 of All About Spelling and I am learning patience there. C continues to be progressing in reading and we started All About Reading Level 1 this week. He is loving it. Handwriting continues to be a struggle for him, but he is making slow and steady progress. 

One area we slacked in this week was math for E. we are having to go back and finish a chapter I skipped because it was so "involved." It is a chapter on measurements and involves scales, buckets of water, quart and liter jugs, as well as the metric system. I admit, I myself am currently unable to compare lbs to kilograms and hauling buckets of water in to weigh seems...messy. So, we skipped math a lot this week. Sigh. Next week we will have fix that. I am NOT looking forward to it. We did do some, weighing books and other household items. I was amazed at how much this little gymnast could carry! I have never doubted that she is strong, but even I was shocked! She thought it was great fun until I made her hold the pose while I took a picture! :)




Thursday: school day with an extra. My nephew schooled with us and one more second grader added to the chaos = More chaos! :) 

Friday: J had music class. E and C had breakfast out with daddy. Then we all headed to an art class without local homeschool group. We made pumpkins and scarecrows out of polymer clay. Very fun!

 

Spent the afternoon at the park for a playdate and before you know it, it's time to take E to the gym for Friday practice. This week was super busy!

I love making memories and the kids having wonderful experiences, but I think we need a break! I think next week we will try to scale back and find that routine we once had and loved!



Busyness: Week 13

by on 6:38 PM
There are some weeks that when you finally sit down and reflect you think, goodness! I need a break! This was one of those weeks! Sunday: ...
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I love the sound of my children. No, not screaming, crying, whining, or complaining... Yes those sounds are present (all too) often, but yesterday as I had a few hours to myself, it was quiet. Too quiet. As parents we often long for quiet. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed it. But the moment the garage door opened and the sound of running feet and giggles filled the house, I couldn't help but smile.

All day long I tell them to be quiet, no screaming, and hush. Whining is like nails on a chalkboard and I cannot put a number on how many times a day I say, "I will hear you when your voice sounds like mine." But the truth is those are the sounds of being little, and those sounds just won't last long enough.


As J and I cuddled up this morning and the daddy tickle monster caught us hiding under the covers... These are the sounds of joy. The sounds of giggles and laughter. I want these to be the sounds of my home. Laughter not tears. Giggles not shouts, affirmation not criticism. Feet running towards me, not away. These are the sounds of littles.

I want our home to be filled with the sounds of joy. I know life happens. Children cry and whine, and discipline is necessary. But I want to choose to laugh more. Put down the phone and iPad and choose to play, tickle, and chase. Choose to call them close and not send them off to play. Hold them a little longer, a little tighter. Smile more, laugh more, choose joy more. Because the sounds of littles will be gone before I know it.
"I will turn their mourning into joy;
I will comfort them, and give them gladness for sorrow." Jeremiah 31:13

The Sounds of Little

by on 9:44 AM
I love the sound of my children. No, not screaming, crying, whining, or complaining... Yes those sounds are present (all too) often, but yes...
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I hear that all the time from non homeschoolers. Or I don't have the patience. How do you do it? I am not sure why nonhomeschoolers think homeschool moms get an extra dose of patience or love or grace. We don't. I don't think we love our children any more, are any more prepared, or have secret superpowers. We have good days and we have bad days. We have great weeks and we have terrible ones.

Sometimes I think blogging has a way of making homeschooling look unreal. All fun and no tears. This is just not truth, and ANY homeschool mom will attest to that! We do have plenty of great days, plenty of fun. We get to be flexible, follow interests, go on tons of field trips, do projects, play games...and yet, we are talking about real life humans doing these things. When a game day ends in tears because someone got arrogant or sensitive. When math or writing seems so overwhelming tears are unleashed. Days when someone is just having a bad day. We have plenty of those.

In the interest of keeping this blog real, and not letting it look like we have it all together...I want to share about our week. The good, the bad, and the ugly right? Buckle up for some ugly!

(In all fairness, this face is in response to being told he had completed his All About Reading Level. :)
I assured him the next level was on its way!)


Monday: got up early to school at my sister's who is sick and needed help homeschoolong her girls, Lego class, and then back to my sisters to finish school. Took E to the gym.

J and her friend at Lego class.

Tuesday: got off to a rough start, I was irritable and that trickled down to the kids. I managed to get C's school done before heading to my parents to meet my sister to school. Afternoon field trip to the Locks and nature center.



Family dinner at my parents. Late night debate led to getting home late which led to . . .

A tired Wednesday: we managed to do "school" but I sent this text to my husband in the early afternoon--

Ugh. Exhausted. Procrastinating. Unmotivated. Did I mention exhausted? Way too much time wasted and now we still have so much to do. Consider this my confession. Did I mention I was exhausted?

Continued plugging along and then before I knew it, yup, time to take E to the gym, Crazily throw sandwiches together so we can eat before church. Church night so another late night.

Thursday: downward spirals rarely turn up by themselves, and somewhere around Tuesday, if not then SURELY Wednesday I should have realized it was time to back off and switch gears. Apparently I am dense this week and as Thursday got underway ... well, lets just say I didn't switch gears as I should have. Somewhere after lunch my FB status was-

One of those days I swear someone paid my children to act like this. . . Seriously, who hates me enough and what did you give them?!? I surrender! Ready to enter negotiations!

Several other homeschool moms were quick to commiserate! ;)

Ugh yes, this was my fault. We were all exhausted, grumpy, and I was plowing through the to do list like it mattered. Which it doesn't. As if the yelling and critical spirit wasn't enough I lost the homeschool mom of the year award somewhere between making C cry over math and telling E to "get her freakin' head in the game". :( Yeah, not my shining moments. (Lest anyone freak I overwhelmingly apologized to them and they to me, and all is right in our world again!) Started dinner only to hear screams from the children I just sent outside informing me there was a toad on the playground.

ummm, this was a frog on steroids ... uninvitingly squatting on our playground. And he was less than thrilled with my eviction procedures. After about 20 very frustrating minutes of throwing soccer balls, soccer nets, and using a broom to shoo this Hulk frog away, all I got him to do was jump off. No amount of pleading got him to leave. I abandoned my sad attempts much to the disappointment of some children.

THEN my phone (i.e. GPS) froze on the way to taking dinner to a family with a new baby.  I got snippy with my poor husband as he pulled over in his car to help me navigate where I was going... <shaking my head in frustration at myself>

What a disaster of the week. But wait, it's not over. Remember where I said we were all exhausted? A family birthday had us out late again, and on top of that I had some work to get done and stayed up until 3 am (and I still didn't finish! ugh.)

Friday: woke up late (hmmm wonder why?!) jumped in the shower to take J to music class only to almost pass out. I have this strange heart arythmea that acts up about very few years and decided to rear its ugly head this morning. So for an hour and a half I was on the bathroom floor struggling to breathe and get my heart regulated with my husband wanting to call 911 and me trying to convince myself it will be over soon as it has every other time. (This has been happening since I was young).

Well, all week the hints to slow down were there but I barged right through them with my own task oriented self at the helm. <shaking head again>.

So today, the littles are at work with their grandfather, E and I are having a relaxing day at home while a housekeeper cleans my house. (Thanks to my fantastic hubby!)

So, after a week like this, I should be printing school enrollment papers! But no, the truth is, I am human and we will have days and yes, even weeks like this one. But at the end of the day (or week!), I don't have any more patience than anyone else, or better kids, or more energy, or superpowers. I am just a mom. A mom in love with these three precious kids God has given her. I mess up, sometimes worse than others...At times I frustrate myself and my kids, lose sight of the goal, and rely on my strength not God's, but that's ok. I am not a perfect mom, I am a forgiven mom. A mom who has been called to stay home and educate her three amazing children who will one day make an amazing impact on the kingdom of God. A mom so grateful for grace. I can do this, not because of me, but because of Him.



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We have had a rather hectic week. You know the kind of week when all your commitments catch up with you? Arriving home from NY Sunday afternoon, Monday morning came all too quickly! Monday morning flew by and it was time to head to our first Lego engineering class. The kids have been so excited about this and they were not disappointed! They are looking forward to the next 7 weeks.

The first week back to "normal" never feels very "normal." It was hectic, hard to stay focused, and I was unmotivated! (Yes me not them!) We managed to eek through our week including our Spanish immersion class with our homeschool group on Thursday. (A definite highlight of our week always!)

We try to keep Fridays light, except this week we had some catching up to do. After taking J to music class I was dragging. I just could not motivate myself to do another math or phonics lesson. E had already completed all of her independent work and I did math with her. As I sent C to the school room for his math and phonics lesson, I called an audible. To get out of the funk I decided we could either drag ourselves thought the basics or we could dive into something fun. I am not one to put off academics, and relaxed is not usually a part of my vocabulary, but love of learning IS a major goal here. Drudgery is not.

Enter Viking Fun!

So I put on our SOTW CD's that we had yet to get to this week and the kids colored Viking boats, masks, and paper dolls.





We finished reading Eric the Red and Lief the Lucky and then threw ourselves into creating a Viking ship. I had been planning this but was doubting it would get done. (Yeah, sad, but true).



Fun is the perfect cure for a blah day! Blah day redeemed!
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"Do you have to teach Bible?"
Now while I know what people are really asking when they pose this question is do we have to have Bible as a "subject"? I am always amazed and slighty perplexed when I read or hear the question  More than being perplexed by the question, I am astonished at how often I hear the answer "No, reading the Bible is enough. You don't want to do too much or be overwhelmed." Really? Would you consider just reading your history book? Science book? Grammar book? Of course not. While there is much to be gleaned from just "reading" we must interact and engage the material to really ingest and apply it.

Should you teach Bible as a "school" subject?
I think this is the wrong question. What else do you have to teach that is more important?

As a Christian a Biblical worldview and Biblical literacy is THE most important thing I teach my children. While I desire to pursue academics hand in hand with Biblical literacy and deep character training, the truth is, in my mind, my One Magnificent Obsession in life is not teaching my children the 3 R's but the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I want them to be passionately in love with Jesus and following Him with their whole heart and mind. It is to that end I teach math, reading, and writing.

I am so very passionate about this topic. We live in a culture of Christianity that is Biblically illiterate, and the church is evidence of this. 80% of churched teenagers leave the church at eighteen and never come back. We as Christian parents need to step up and say my child will not be a statistic. By God's grace I will do all I can to assure my children are firmly founded in the Word of God and that the Bible plays not just a role in our homes, but a central role. It is the foundation by which we do all things: make decisions, choose curriculum, choose friends, organize our time, spend our money, choose careers, colleges, and spouses. If the Bible is the basis for such life altering decisions, we should KNOW the Bible, right? Not just stories but the intricacies and doctrines, the people whose lives are offered as examples, and the message of the Gospel on which we hinge everything in our lives.

I had a very wise homeschool mom tell me once when I was tearing my hair out choosing curriculum, that as she looked back on those early years with her kids, the one thing she got right was making Bible the most important thing she did. Even if nothing else got done that day, the teaching of the Bible was the most important thing. I have adapted this mentality. Does that mean we only teach Bible? No, but if I had to choose one thing to do, that would be it.

Does Family Worship replace the need for Bible as a class?
No. Family worship is important but for our family we delineate between family worship and Bible study. During family worship we do our catechism questions, read a portion of Scripture, sing a song and pray. It is more devotional in nature whereas deep Bible study happens during Bible as a subject time.

How do you have time for all of it?
Martin Luther once said “I have so much to do that I shall spend the first three hours in prayer.” This is how I feel about studying the Bible. How can we fully grasp the truth of anything without the Truth? You make time for what you prioritize, and in our home we prioritize the study of the Bible. 

What about if my kids are in Christian school?
So, we are not all homeschoolers. What if your kids attend Christian school? They have Bible class already, so should you do more? Christian schools and churches are to come alongside you as parents to teach the Bible, not substitute you. Do you know what your children are learning in Bible class? That teacher is just a another person, be sure you are checking in on the doctrine and interpretations being offered your child. On the day of judgment it will be your responsibility not your child's Bible teacher or Sunday school teacher. Discuss with your kids what they are learning about the Bible and be sure they are founded in Truth. Be sure to be practicing family worship and prioritizing the Word in your home.

What about if my kids are in public school?
If you have made the choice to put your child in public school, consider this quote by Voddie Baucham.  If we send our children to public school "we shouldn't be surprised when they come home wearing the enemy's uniform and charging the hill of our home waving the enemy flag." Now I do not say this to say no one should put their child in public school, I quote this so you see the urgency of establishing a Biblical worldview and Biblical literacy in your children. The teaching of God's Word to your children is the responsibility of the parent no matter where they go to school.

If it is that important why don't we do it?
This section is not going to win me any brownie points because I plan to be rather blunt. If you were to assess and compare two solid moral families today, one Christian, one not, what would you find? One attends church, prays before meals, and before bed. There would hopefully be some accidental conversation about Jesus, God, and the righteous life at some point, but most of the time it is not intentional.

This is not enough. We spend too much time on everything else that is temporal, and not a fraction of what we should on the eternal. We need to be intentional. Every day we must get up and intentionally build a foundation of Truth in our children, establish a worldview in them in which they will filter truth and stand firm even when they leave our care.

Does this mean we never just READ the Bible?
Certainly not. In my own personal Bible study time sometimes I do deep study surrounded by commentaries, Bible dictionaries, and other study tools, and other times I just read so that the Holy Spirit can furrow His Word into my heart. There is a time to simply read and meditate on God's Word, but meditation always takes deeper root when it falls upon tilled soil.

Be intentional 
Model a love for God's Word in your own heart. Be a lover of the Word and allow your kids to catch your excitement. Read it, study it, memorize it. Feast on it. Treat God's Word with more care than your math book. Give it more time and attention. Establish the role of the Bible in your home knowing that the fruit of it is eternal.
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You know the old adage "God won't give you more than you can handle?" Well, the truth is we can handle a lot. Every day I survive tantrums, screaming, whining, toy explosions, art in various unartistic places, unkind attitudes -- you get the point. No matter the day I have had, each evening I snuggle up with my kids, pray and sing with them and say goodnight. It's usually at that moment that I breathe for the first time in what can seem like hours. It is also usually at this time that I get my first reflective glimpse into my day. As I pray over my children and thank God for the amazing treasures He has given me, I have to face the reality of how I have treated those gifts that day.  Some nights I smile in contentment and joy and some nights tears flow down my face in regret for things I have said and done. But every day I survive. Every day I "handle" it. That isn't enough.

Last week I was having a particularly rough day. Ron was away counseling missionaries in Greece, and I was "holding down the fort," though some days a breeze could have blown it over. As J has gotten older these trips have gotten easier for me. However, this week was crazy. I was trying to clean our way too big house with three kids running around. My mental image all week? That Facebook e-card that says "Trying to clean your house with kids around is like brushing your teeth while eating Oreos."  I was preparing to host 2 exchange students for 2.5 weeks, and preparing to teach 2 weeks of English classes, as well as preparing for our homeschool year which starts directly after this teaching commitment. I was struggling. Spiritually I was being attacked and I knew it. I was allowing sin a foothold and it was obvious to me and my children. You know that awkward moment when you hear your child being nasty to another and your heart freezes and then sinks because . . . well, they sound just like you.

That is not who I want to be as a parent. Generational sin is tough,and way too many times last week I got on level with one of my kids and apologized for raising my voice. I am not proud of those moments, but I am ever so grateful for them. As I heard myself in my children, I was slapped in the face with my reality. They are the most effective mirrors in my house and sometimes what I see is not pretty. In the trenches last week as I was struggling and too often failing God spoke. You know the lighting bolt to your heart that stops you in your tracks. It's not about what you can handle. It's about what you can handle with grace. It's about what you are handling well. I stopped and prayed to be filled with God's grace. Grace that only He can give. Grace that forgives. Grace that causes peace in the midst of the storm.

Mirror, Mirror . . .

by on 3:29 PM
You know the old adage "God won't give you more than you can handle?" Well, the truth is we can handle a lot. Every day I surv...
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8 days of the school year left. 2 days until a work training and certification test. 9 days until we leave on our family Disney cruise. 14 days until Orlando vacation. 18 days until my niece's graduation party and my birthday. 21 days until C's VPK graduation. 22 days until homeschool convention. 25 days until niece's graduation. 26 days until my nephew's birthday. 34 days until VBS. 38 days until I can breathe. oh wait and then we have E's birthday and. . . yeah you get the point.

While this is a super busy time for us, it never is really calm. All wonderful things (well mostly!) ;) Yet, sooooo much. How do I keep things in perspective, not waste these days looking onto the next? I will never get these days or weeks back, and in the midst of the chaos, I want to finish strong . . . not just finish.

So as I look towards the end, I am always reminded of the beginning. When finishing a homeschooling year, homeschooling moms know we are not focused on the current year, we are all busy planning the next year! I have heard of moms even scratching their current plan to begin the new one early. Always looking ahead to better or newer. Looking to the beginning allows us to reevaluate our priorities and goals. We are reminded anew why we do what we do, and can get back on track if we have allowed ourselves to drift.

Last week at a leadership planning meeting as we filled the calendar with dates of Bible studies and activities, my first reaction is, I don't mind being busy but it has to be worth it. It has to have eternal value. The key to finishing strong is to only finish that which is worth it. Take a look at the calendar, get rid of that which isn't worth it. Focus on that which advances the Kingdom of God. Our goal is to pursue the glory of God in all things in our lives. In homeschool we glorify God by pursuing excellence in all. We do not sacrifice character for academics. We do not sacrifice academics for character. Excellence may not always look the same for every every family or even for a family at any given time. It is about giving our best. Even in finishing.

Finishing Strong

by on 10:22 AM
8 days of the school year left. 2 days until a work training and certification test. 9 days until we leave on our family Disney cruise. 14 d...
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